Category Archives: Love

Choosing Radical Love Over Fear

As I observe my thoughts during this unprecedented time of division and an increasing sense of ‘us’ vs. ‘them’ in the United States, I find myself experiencing a range of emotions. Are you?

Deep down, I refuse to feel disempowered or fearful of things that might happen in the future. But sometimes on the surface, I watch myself feel angry, sad, puzzled, dismayed, and yes, sometimes a bit fearful. I am 67 years old and my remaining decades aren’t as many as they were in my 30s. So, my justified anger and fear and sadness really isn’t for me, it’s for the children of this world.

When I pray, I repeatedly ask, “What is mine to do?”  And the answer is always — “Love more and be more kind”.

For those of you who would like to love more, and I mean RADICALLY love more, I have decided to share Chapter 21, “Love Radically” in my Wellness Wisdom book. You’ll find 7 Steps to Choosing “Radical” Love Over Fear at the end of the chapterPlease let me know which step(s) will be most supportive for you.

Excerpt from 

Wellness Wisdom: 31 Ways to Nourish Your Mind, Body, & Spirit
2nd edition, 2011

by
Susan Tate 

Chapter 21
Love Radically

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love.
But the greatest of these is love.
~1 Corinthians 13:13

Years ago I gave my father a spice tin labeled “Love.” At the time, he was lovingly taking over all of the cooking responsibilities as he nourished my mother in her final year of life. Printed at the bottom of the tin was the net weight “immeasurable”—and the list of ingredients included: joy, kindness, patience, peace, trust, and goodness, among other loving qualities. The directions for use encouraged the cook to add a big pinch of Love to every recipe. I believe my dad was adding a big dose of “radical love” to my mom’s life in many sweet and tender ways. After my father passed away, I inherited this spice tin and use it frequently. It has a place of honor on my kitchen stove.

As you know, you don’t need a spice tin to add love to food or to life. When I put my attention toward love, I find that it fills and deeply nourishes my mind, body, and spirit. This attention doesn’t come from a place of seeking or longing, but rather it seems to be radically splashing out from me. As I splash, I have learned that love flows best when it flows freely, with no expectations attached. And in challenging situations when that flow feels blocked, I often ask, “What would love do now?”

The word radical means, “relating to or affecting the fundamental nature in something.” Its synonyms are: fundamental, essential, deep-seated, sweeping, thorough, far-reaching, and major. What great sentiments to think about when deepening your thoughts on love, or commitment, or marriage.

A few years ago I was having a great conversation with a man I had just met. He mentioned that he was still friends with his former wife, despite the fact that he had experienced a failed marriage. After commenting on how awesome it was to still be friends with his former wife, I found myself telling him, “I’ve had two successful marriages!” I went on to say, “I’ve been divorced twice but I refuse to think of them as ‘failed’ marriages.” I surprised myself, as it had taken me years to forgive myself for choosing to end the 25-year marriage to my high school sweetheart and a two-year marriage that followed some years later. Initially, I felt like I had a scarlet “D” on my forehead. I, Susan Tate, was Divorced. I was embarrassed and a bit ashamed that I couldn’t make a marriage work “till death do us part.” But as I healed my heart, I realized those two marriages were filled with love—radical love. I’m glad I was married.

And I wouldn’t trade a day. These experiences were successful in taking me to the next level of learning and loving. I learned so much and I treasure and respect both marriages. I personally believe I had a sacred soul agreement with each of these amazing men. Do I wish I could have been married and reveling in the happily-ever-after? Of course, but that’s not what life dealt and I don’t regret my decisions. Did everyone work as hard as they could to save the marriages? My response is an unequivocal, “Yes.” Now that’s fundamental, essential, deep-seated, sweeping, thorough, far-reaching, and major love!

Speaking of radical love, I must admit that prior to my first divorce, I would judge people who couldn’t stay married, couldn’t make their marriage “successful;” and I too thought people and marriages had failed. I am still learning lessons of humility and non-judging. I was standing next to a good friend in her kitchen when she spoke about a woman we both knew: “She’s on her third husband!” (A somewhat judgmental statement, just like I used to make.) She said it like that was some horrid damnable thing! “Bite your tongue!” I said to her. “I plan to be on my third husband some day!”

While we’re on the topic of love, marriage, and commitment, I ecstatically recommend Elizabeth Gilbert’s Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage.” She presents a history of marriage that is enlightening, captivating, and sometimes startling. Her personal navigation through her own belief system may prompt an expanded awareness of your own beliefs.

Marriage is sacred to me and I honor and value it. And sometimes marriages end, and it’s healthier that way for everyone. And it hurts like hell (and by the way, no, I don’t think I’m going there!) So, if your marriage or commitment to a life partner has ended, consider (in time) calling it a success. Love yourself. Love the other. Now, that’s radical love, don’t you think?

In other circumstances, it’s quite easy to love. The words, “I love you” flow easily in my daily prayers as I send loving thoughts to my children, grandchildren, family, and friends. That’s easy love. But for me, loving radically sometimes means loving people when they might not appear very loveable. It means sending love to terrorists and people I don’t really like. It means sending love to the person at the post office who was wearing a hat to cover her hair loss from radiation treatments. It means loving myself as I am now, as I was before, and as the person I am becoming.

Radical love can also mean choosing love over fear. Do you have a steady hum of fear running through your mind? How would it feel to shift your fearful thinking to “love-full” thinking?

Cellular biologist Bruce Lipton, Ph.D., writes an attention-grabbing statement in his powerful work, The Biology of Belief: Unleashing the Power of Consciousness, Matter and Miracles. He states, “The simple truth is, when you’re frightened you’re dumber.” Now I am not one to label someone’s intelligence, but after reading his biological explanation of how our cells respond so unfavorably to a steady diet of fear, I believe I personally make healthier, smarter choices when choosing love rather than fear.

Dr. Lipton’s statement doesn’t refer to the instant rush of adrenaline or cortisol that floods our bloodstream when the “fight or flight” response kicks into gear as our body or mind perceives a fear-filled threat. This response is actually a built-in source of genetic wisdom that supports our quick reactions and decision-making that will hopefully keep us safe. In these instances, fear is a good thing, and the chemical reactions in the body are designed to support us in making smarter decisions.

Instead, Lipton’s statement refers to a steady diet of fight/flight, over-activated by a build-up of excessive stress. That constant drain actually challenges our decision-making process and can lead to choices that probably aren’t as smart as decisions we’d choose through the lens of love.

Overall, when we make decisions based on love rather than fear, our choices will be healthier, as well as smarter. When I view this concept through a political lens, it makes me respect our leaders who draw from the energy of love rather than fear. When I tune in to my business decisions, I want to be sure I am making grounded, intelligent, and loving choices for the good of all involved. In relationships, I want to speak from the chambers of my heart where I know love (radical love) and truth reside. In financial decision-making, I want to choose with intelligence and without the six-o’clock news scaring me with a constant forecast of economic or global gloom and doom.

Rev. Michael Bernard Beckwith expresses a powerful view of love in his words: “Love. You are not meant to search for it. You are not meant to wait for it. You are meant to generate it.” Hmm, that could be my new definition of radical love.

Here are a seven action steps aimed at directing your thinking more toward radical love. Feel free to add more.

Seven Steps for Choosing (Radical) Love Over Fear

  1. Lovingly observe when you enter the emotional realm of fearful thinking. You might say to yourself, “Ah, this is an opportunity for me to choose either fear or love. I choose love.”
  2. Take three deep, calming breaths when you notice stressful, physical sensations in your gut, the pit in your stomach, your rapidly beating heart, or the tightness in your neck or back.
  1. Practice mindfulness meditation.
  1. Move your body. Walk, run, swim, dance, bike, do Nia, yoga or Pilates. Physical exercise produces endorphins (providing a morphine-like high) right from your body’s own personal pharmacy.
  1. Pray, meditate, chant or sing. Marianne Williamson wisely suggests that we place our fears and concerns “on the altar to be altered.” I love that concept!
  1. Extend love often and be the place where love shows up.
  1. Generate and choose radical love every chance you get.

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross said, “Make your decisions based on love, not fear.” It is our choice. I want to love radically. Do you?

Click here to learn more about Wellness Wisdom: 31 Ways to Nourish Your Mind, Body, & Spirit

Click here to learn more about Susan’s Holistic Health Coaching

©2000 – 2017 Susan Tate

Where is HOME?

grandma-soraya-molly

Molly and I took Soraya to feed her beloved goats at the Gasthof Kleefeld Family Farm in Wolfgangsee last week.

“Hallo!” from Austria, or “Grüß Gott” as the greeting is in this beautiful country. I love the translation: “God greet you!”

You may or may not know that I am here in Austria to support my daughter, Molly, and her family as we await the arrival of my granddaughter’s little sister who is due in two weeks. This unique time with Molly and Soraya is being recorded deep in the center of my heart forever. I feel profoundly blessed to be here and to be extended the generosity of Molly’s husband’s loving Austrian family and their home. (Note: Molly has spent a good part of her pregnancy away from their own home in Fiji because of the Zika outbreak there. Her husband just arrived here two days ago. Hooray!)

My life here is completely different than my life back home. I’m packing snacks for Soraya’s mornings in nursery school, making yogurt popsicles, doing laundry, preparing meals, enjoying doing Nia with my granddaughter, doing laundry, taking my daughter to doctor’s appointments, changing diapers, (did I mention I am doing laundry–AND few people have dryers here?), teaching Soraya songs while she plays in the bathtub, reading to her, learning to use strollers and car seats made in the 21st century, and well, you probably get the picture!

All of this fills me with love. And it hasn’t all been magical and roses and easy. I do tend to focus on the love though, and it makes everything worthwhile and treasured.

I am learning a bit of German, driving along country and city roads, and eating foods readily enjoyed by people in this part of the world. I will be in Austria for a good two months so I’ve found that I’ve settled in here and consider it “home” at the moment.

Home–this word has new meaning for me. The saying “Home is where the heart is” now has a more expanded significance. At this time in my life, I feel deeply that, “Home is where love is.” I am learning to be at home anywhere. I can do this if I just remember to pack the love in my heart and then unpack it wherever I go. When I forget, things can get difficult.

My childhood home was in the countryside of Western Pennsylvania–about 30 minutes from Pittsburgh. After graduating from Penn State in 1971, I married my high school sweetheart and moved to Youngstown, Ohio where my husband was finishing his last year of college. That was home for several years.

In 1979, the three of us (we now had a 3-year-old son, Zachary) moved to Free Union, Virginia–just outside of Charlottesville. Molly was born there a year later. It was home for 20 years and the place where I also “grew up” as we raised our children and filled our home with love.

While there, I was a health teacher at Charlottesville High School and then worked for almost ten years at the University of Virginia as the Director of Health Promotion and assistant professor in the School of Medicine. I loved it there–my family, my friends, the community, the Blue Ridge Mountains, my colleagues, my life. I discovered Nia there and taught my first Nia classes there too.

In 2000, several years after our 25-year marriage ended, I followed my soul’s calling to move to the Seattle area. It has been home, a treasured home for me, for over 16 years.

And now it’s time to move again. It seems that the unexpected closing of three Nia studio doors in the past year has opened up a path that is guiding me to return to Charlottesville. I will be moving there on December 1. I had heard that when God closes one door, He opens another. But THREE doors? Believe me, I am paying attention! This decision to move is a big surprise to me. I am clearly letting the Divine take the lead on this one.

It feels like my work in Seattle is complete and my soul is beckoning me to this next season of my life. As I write this it feels both real and surreal. Seattle will always be a home to me–and the people I met there will hold a dear place in my heart. My gratitude is deep and my heart is full.

As I reflect on my professional life in Seattle, I smile about some of the things I accomplished:

I created Washington Wellness Associates (re-branded as www.susantate.org) and expanded my work to reach across the globe . . .

Earned my black belt as a Nia teacher and taught Nia classes weekly in Seattle and offered workshops across the United States, Canada, Mexico, and in Europe . . .

Joined Team Northrup and added a global nutritional product partner to share information and products to support the health of others . . .

Wrote two editions of Wellness Wisdom: 31 Ways to Nourish Your Mind, Body, & Spirit . . .

Wrote the 3rd edition of my first book, Into the Mouths of Babes . . .

Offered hundreds of hours of holistic wellness coaching sessions, both in person and through telephone or Skype across the globe . . .

Became an ordained wedding officiant and married 13 couples in various cities across the United States . . .

Studied at Sanoviv Medical Institute, a functional medicine hospital in Rosarito, Mexico to become a Certified Nutritional Advisor . . .

Presented over 50 work site wellness presentations in the Greater Seattle area . . .

Led retreats and wellness workshops across the globe . . .

And I “grew up” a bit more as I learned to love even more deeply.

As I move in between homes, I respect the opportunity to connect with you through the many wellness services I offer. Thank you for allowing me to serve you.

What will I do in Virginia? I am not sure exactly, but I feel lucky to have created a wellness business that is portable, and even global. So, I’ll pack up www.susantate.org,
pack my love, and be on my way.

Home–where is it for you? Is it a physical structure that you move in and out of? Is it where your love is? Can you take your love and pack it with you when you go to the store, or to work, or to the park, or on a plane, or to a different country? I’d love to hear your thoughts about home. Feel free to leave a comment here!

13 Tips for Transformational Wellness

13 TIPS FOR TRANSFORMATIONAL

“All transformation begins with an intense burning desire to be transformed.”
~Wayne Dyer

Do you have this intense burning desire to transform a part of you life that isn’t serving you? Are you looking for a little less stress in your life? Are you desiring to feel more love? Do you want to feel really, really well?

These 13 Tips for Transformational Wellness will take only 13 seconds to read. Then you can choose one to practice–and of course practicing them will take MORE than 13 seconds–but they are all capable of adding to your well-being. And all of them are filled with love.

We get to take one step at at time on our wellness path. Which one will you choose for your next step?

  1. Intend to be well
  2. Listen to your body
  3. Nourish the body/mind temple
  4. Live in the present moment
  5. Pray and/or meditate
  6. Seek balance and pleasure
  7. Speak your truth with kindness
  8. Reframe worrying
  9. Cultivate forgiveness
  10. Practice peace
  11. Love radically
  12. Don’t complain
  13. Magnify gratitude

If you would like suggestions for implementing each of these tips, you will enjoy learning more in my book, Wellness Wisdom: 31 Ways to Nourish Your Mind, Body, & Spirit.

Buy Into the Mouths of Babes on Amazon

Please let me know which one you picked to play with today! Please leave a comment here or come on over to my SusanTateCommunity Facebook page and share your thoughts.

©2016 Susan Tate

11 Ways to Choose Love Over Fear

MakeYourChoicesQuoteWe are living in extraordinary times. Clearly, it is important to know about things that can keep us safe. But what is being splashed in front of us at a rapid rate is repeatedly fearful information aimed at keeping us on edge. Do you think it’s time to boldly create a revolution based on love and not fear? I do.

I recall the drills we had in the 1950s when we tucked ourselves underneath our little first grade desks to practice saving ourselves in case we were attacked by Russia. I don’t want to duck my head anymore. I want to look out more with a vision of peace, a sharing of our abundance, and a mindful caring for our fellow human beings, whether they live in the United States or some other place on this globe.

I want the children to walk upon this planet with light and love-filled steps and a trust in the adults who are guiding their way. I want our children to make safe, healthy, and loving choices.

During the 1990s, I was the Director of Health Promotion at the University of Virginia. “Make your choices based on love, not fear” was the Elisabeth Kübler-Ross quote we selected to be printed on the back of the condom packs provided during our Peer Health Education workshops. Yes, stop and think about it. We wanted students making safer choices because they had a respect and love for themselves (what a concept!) more than they feared unwanted pregnancy or sexually transmitted infection.

Today, I would like to see this quote boldly printed on the nightly news, at our banks, in our work settings, in our cars, in our grocery stores, and all over social media.

We can speak and think from a place of fear or from a place of love.

 “Make your choices based on love, not fear.” We have the choice to shower our world with love or react with fear. I’m choosing love. How about you?

Here are my suggestions for how to choose love over fear. Feel free to add to the list.

11 Ways to Choose Love over Fear

  1. Notice when worry or fear creeps into your thinking. Observe the fear, release it as you exhale, and then breathe in love instead. Repeat if necessary.
  2. Pray, meditate, chant, or sing.
  3. Observe and give gratitude when sacred peace envelops you.
  4. When fear invades your thinking, move your body. Walk, run, swim, dance, bike, do Nia, yoga or other physical activities that create endorphins from your body’s inner pharmacy. If you move through your day in a wheelchair, take time to get outside and connect your wheels to the earth and breathe in love.
  5. Observe your tendency to judge others and gradually lose interest in doing so.
  6. Be the place where love shows up.
  7. Notice your surroundings and the people in it with appreciation. This may result in being more accepting of people who don’t think, look, or act like you.
  8. Choose to no longer view the “other” as “other.”
  9. If you watch or read the news, use it to support your prayer practice. And then spread good news whenever you can.
  10. Forgive someone. Feel free to put yourself at the top of your list.
  11. Choose love.

In what ways to choose love over fear? Please feel free to leave a comment here or come on over to my Susan Tate Community Facebook page.

 

©2016 Susan Tate

 

 

 

 

 

Spiritual Wellness, Prayer, & Meditation

 

Prayer hand over heart

Spiritual wellness is a uniquely personal journey for each of us. As we awaken each day, we get to choose how we will view world events, our country, our local community, and the life experiences we are experiencing in this moment. We get to choose peaceful thoughts or worrying thoughts, loving thoughts or fearful ones. I don’t know about you, but lately, prayer and meditation have been more valuable than ever in sustaining my spiritual wellness. This prompted me to share an excerpt from my Wellness Wisdom book. May you enjoy it with a sense of sacred peace.

Chapter 7: Pray and Meditate

However you choose to pray, you will deepen the communication between you and the Divine. I view praying as a reverent act of deeply communing with or talking to God. The message goes out as if we were talking to someone on the phone. I view meditation as listening to God via a heavenly phone—to recognize that voice we must be quiet so we might hear.

Declarative prayer is one of the many ways of communicating with God. With declarative prayer, you state that you accept the quality or thing you want in your life right now. An example would be, “I accept radiant health and wholeness.” Until a few years ago, I had always prayed using the “Please God” begging method. Now I assume divine help and support. Everyone prays differently and I certainly believe God listens to us however we pray; but I really like this positive, trusting, affirming method and it has been extremely powerful in my life. I’m learning to give up a time line, to trust divine guidance. I’m also learning to give up being right about many things. And there are times when I still get down on my knees, sometimes weeping with a “Please God” at the beginning (and the end) of my prayer. God listens.

Some people love reading the Bible, the Koran, Bhagavad Gita, The Course in Miracles, or from the Vedic texts. Others enjoy poetry or philosophical readings to connect them to Spirit. You may find the prayers of your childhood to be soothing. Find what works best for you.

There’s a beautiful meditation that I have found to be simple yet profound. It’s from an ancient Hawaiian practice known as Ho’oponopono (meaning “to make right.”) The words are simple and powerful: “I am sorry, please forgive me, I love you, I thank you.” What’s your favorite prayer?

In the early nineties, I had the honor of meeting monthly with my sangha “sisters” to enjoy dinner together, to listen to “what’s up” for us, and to pray. (Sangha is a Sanskrit word that means “community.”) We then shared our prayer requests for the month and agreed to pray for each other in between our meetings. Would a gathering of your own prayer community support your spiritual wellness?

I don’t think God minds whether we declare what we most desire or simply ask for it. God is ever-present and knows you well, so praying the way that feels best for you will keep this part of your spiritual wellness sacred. The ritual of praying the rosary or reciting the Hebrew words that hold a place in your heart may be the way you connect and become closer with the Divine. If you are one of many seekers who yearn to heal wounds created by old religious beliefs, you may enjoy reading Joan Borysenko’s A Woman’s Journey to God. She offers inspiration to women and men who want to create new ways of prayer and connection to Spirit.

I’ve heard it said that prayer changes us, not God. It can be an empowering way of shifting so we know what the next best steps might be. Have you heard the saying, “Pray and move your feet”?

Meditation, a very ancient practice, is growing in popularity in our fast-paced western society filled to overflowing with cell phones, text messaging, Facebook and BlackBerry technology. How interesting that meditation needs no expensive electronic equipment, just a quiet mind. Not too many years ago, if you lived in North America and told someone you were meditating they may have looked at you a little funny. Today, many people join meditation groups or classes and are aware that it is a practice done daily by many people worldwide.

Swiss-born psychiatrist, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, author of the ground-breaking book On Death and Dying said, “Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself and know that everything in this life has a purpose.” It may seem intriguing to think we might need to get in touch with silence—it seems like such a simple act. Yet, for many of us, our mental chatter is in high gear during most of our waking hours. Taking the time to sit in silence opens up an avenue of peace that adds richness and deep wisdom to a spiritual practice. Take some time to listen, observe, and not judge the thoughts that pass through your head. Like clouds in the sky, thoughts pass by us and are replaced by new ones. Your gentle breath can guide you as you breathe in and breathe out.

As with prayer, many styles of meditating are available. Some individuals prefer to listen to their iPod or to CDs that provide guided meditations full of soothing words and images. You might enjoy listening to Karen Drucker’s tender song Morning Prayer at the start of your day—it’s one of my favorites. Other people meditate by sitting still or lying still in complete silence, quieting the mind of all thoughts. When a thought enters the mind, the idea is to notice it, observe it and let it pass. You can say, “That’s a thought,” and watch it melt away. Eventually, the noisy mind becomes still and you have access to divine wisdom. That wisdom is always there, I believe, but it has a tough time getting through our constant, sometimes flood-like stream of thoughts.

How would your day be different if you started it with just five minutes of silence? Ten minutes? How would your day be different if you added one of the above suggestions to your spiritual practices? If you’re interested in experiencing the simplicity of silence, you can try taking a walk alone or planning an hour to move in silence with no TV, computer, music, or cell phone.

Like prayer, meditation is a gift you give yourself. Talking to God, listening to God—what a high and holy conversation. I can just hear God saying, “Can you hear me now?”

What practices do you have in place that sooth your soul? As I have strengthened the spiritual dimension of my own wellness path, these seven spiritual activities and resources have added blessings to my spiritual wellness. Everyone defines “spiritual wellness” in their own way and I want to note that the following resources are not affiliated with any religion. I encourage you to explore which activities feel right (if any) for you to add to your own practices of spiritual wellness.

Seven Practices to Enhance Your Spiritual Wellness

  1. Start your day with five minutes of inspirational reading, music, or meditation. I often begin my day with Karen Drucker’s beautiful song, “Morning Prayer.” (From her latest CD Songs of the Spirit IIII.)
  2. End your day with your own thank-you prayers or by mentally listing ten things you were grateful for that day.
  3. Consider learning about the powerful Hawaiian practice called Ho’oponopono. It has simple, peaceful, and poignant lines: Dear God (Or whatever you call the Divine) I am sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. And I thank you. You may want to Google “Ho’oponopono” to explore resources that appeal to you.
  4. Listen to healing music that sooths your soul. My favorite is the music to support the “healing stream” practice created by Bruno Groening (www.bruno-groening.org). This free music is available by clicking on “download” and then “music.” My personal favorite is an instrumental entitled, “II Gitarre 2.”
  5. Subscribe to a daily message that uplifts your spirit. Abraham-Hicks Publications (www.abraham-hicks.com) has a daily quote I read at the start of my day. The top corner of their banner says, “You are loved. All is well.” If I read nothing else, it’s a great reminder that makes me smile each morning.
  6. Create or discover a daily affirmation or short prayer that inspires and directs your day. Gay Hendricks shares what he calls the “Ultimate Success Mantra” in his empowering book, The Big Leap. “I expand in abundance, success, and love every day, as I inspire those around me to do the same.” I love this affirmation since it includes others too.
  7. Find ways to access the healing power of love. If it calls to you, check out Robert G. Fritchie’s work through the World Service Institute (www.worldserviceinstitute.org). This organization teaches people how to apply Divine Love as a healing energy to amplify spiritual wellness.

Excerpt from Wellness Wisdom: 31 Ways to Nourish Your Mind, Body, & Spirit, 2nd ed (2011) by Susan Tate

Do you have practices that support your spiritual wellness? I’d love to hear about it here or over on my Susan Tate Community Facebook page.

 

 

Posted 3/25/16

 

 

©2000 – 2016 Susan Tate


The Space In Between

spaceinbetweenA few days ago, the management of the beautiful dance space where I have been teaching Nia for nine years gave us a week’s notice to cancel further classes and return our keys. My last class there will be Saturday morning, December 20. When I read the email notification, I immediately went into a very spiritual mode of thinking. “Ahh, everything will be okay! I wonder what’s next?” Within five minutes my mind took me to incredibly human thoughts (not so spiritual) and then I circled around to the spiritual view again. I’ve gone through shock, anger, acceptance, confusion, sadness, and denial. My grief is still present. But I am settling pretty deep into acceptance. I am keenly aware that, if this is one my biggest problems of the year, I’m very lucky.

What I want to share with you is the feeling of peace that is coming to me (in spurts) now. It’s similar to the feeling I had when we sold my parents’ home in the late 90s. My mother had died in 1996, two years later one of my younger sisters died, and then my dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and could no longer live alone. It was time to sell the family home and pack up 53 years of a household.

As I wrote in chapter 25 of my Wellness Wisdom book, I vividly remember the feeling of sitting by myself in the family living room as I gazed at all that was around me. There was the family Bible on the table by my dad’s favorite chair, my mom’s music box collection, a small bust of Jackie Kennedy, family photographs on the dining room wall, and the old maple stereo console we’d had since the sixties. Anticipating the next four days of packing and removing remnants of our family’s life together in my childhood home, I began to cry. It seemed like a task I was too young to be doing and nothing seemed to make any sense. How would it feel to never come home again?

After praying for a few minutes, I felt a deep sense of peace wash over me. Spirit was clearly at work here, as I felt I was receiving a profound gift that enabled me to move through this passage with grace, strength, and trust. This gift proved to be more valuable than any household item in our lovely family home. I realized that it wasn’t the stuff, it wasn’t the dishes, and it wasn’t the doors or the walls or my old bedroom that was important at that moment. It wasn’t the living room where I stood for photos in my prom and wedding dresses or groaned when mom wanted to take one more family picture. It wasn’t the things—it was the space in between that was important. The gift was the realization that the space in between all this stuff was where I had learned to love. And that love was something I was able to safely pack with me and keep for the rest of my life. My tears stopped and I thanked God for the gift of this peaceful insight, and for the gift of such loving parents.

And now after nine precious years, I am leaving The Dance Space—unexpectedly. This space was like a home to me and to many students and teachers in our Nia Seattle community. It seems that here too, it was the space in between where we danced and laughed and played and cried and expressed joy and love. It was the space in between where we connected as dancers, friends, supported each others’ life events, and sometimes danced and donated to send healing and resources to places throughout the world.

I notice the similarities with leaving my family home and leaving The Dance Space now. It was the space in between where I found a loving Nia family that was always there for me as I celebrated birthdays and holidays without my children and grandchildren at my side. I will take all of that with me and I don’t even have to pack it!

I will take with me the feeling and energy of the love that we generated there. I offer gratitude for every student who walked through that door. I offer gratitude for each of the (over 1,000) classes  that I had the honor of teaching there. I offer gratitude for all the workshops held there. I offer gratitude to each of my Nia teaching colleagues for sharing their gifts there. I offer gratitude for the experience of teaching a Nia class in April with my daughter and granddaughter in the class–three generations doing Nia together, I offer gratitude for the space and for the neighborhood. I will leave the studio free and clear to serve the next people to enter. I will clear the space and take all my personal energy with me. That will leave my body, mind, spirit, and emotions free to embrace the next dancing steps; and lead me to the perfect studio space so I can continue to share my beloved Nia practice. My wish is for my students and our Nia community to be open to doing the same.

Are you in a time of life where you can see the value of the spaces in between? I’d love to hear about it here or over on my Susan Tate Community Facebook page.

Posted 12/17/15

 

Affirmations for Your Wellness Path

Affirmations for Wellness

We have over 60,000 thoughts a day and most of them were also bonking around in our heads yesterday. These thoughts most often reflect our subconscious beliefs. So, the power in a positive affirming statement is that it can slowly but surely become a welcome part of those repetitive thoughts and eventually become a belief. You can affirm something peaceful or affirm something to create worry or suffering. You get to choose. And although most people find daily affirmations make their lives feel better, they do not “work” simply by saying, “I am getting healthier every day” while you are sitting on the sofa eating bonbons. There’s a saying I love, “Pray and move your feet!”

Here are the “Affirmations for Wellness” I share in my Wellness Wisdom book.  At the end of these affirmations, you’ll find resources to support you in reprogramming your subconscious beliefs, which are about 95% of your thoughts. I think of affirmations as a way of “recording over” the old beliefs. Have fun in your own personal recording studio!

 

AFFIRMATIONS FOR WELLNESS

I accept balance in all aspects of me; including my mental, physical, spiritual, and emotional self.

I am enough.

Every cell in my body vibrates with health.

I forgive myself and I forgive others for any behaviors or beliefs
that have caused pain.

I release and bless all thoughts and beliefs that no longer serve
my highest purpose.

God (or whatever you call the Divine) is at home in me.

I am filled with gratitude for the abundant blessings I constantly receive
from Spirit.

I allow myself to love greatly and be greatly loved.

I am constantly discovering my joy and it is powerful.

I am surrounded by feelings of harmony and peace.

I accept and receive all of my good now.

I lovingly accept joyful health to flow in and through my body.

I accept radiant health and wholeness.

I am a generous giver and a gracious receiver.

I commit to taking more time each day to be silent and still.

I know that now is the God moment.

I express my emotions with authenticity and clarity.

I speak with kindness, truth, and compassion.

I joyfully live a life full of integrity.

I mindfully choose my response to any circumstance
or condition.

I am grateful for my body.

I revel in wholeness.

Affirmations from my book: Wellness Wisdom: 31 Ways to Nourish Your Mind, Body, & Spirit by Susan Tate

Resources, affirmations, and support for re-writing that old script in your head!

Become What You Believe: Free 21-day meditation series from Deepak Choprak & Oprah Winfrey (started 11-2-15)

The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer

The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer

Louise Hay’s 101 Power Thoughts

The Honeymoon Effect by Bruce Lipton

The MindBody Code: How to Change the Beliefs that Limit Your Health, Longevity, and Success by Mario Martinez

The Tapping Solution by Mark Hyman, MD  and Nick Ortner

 

 

Magnify Gratitude

With GratitudeMagnify Gratitude

Excerpt from Chapter 31:
Wellness Wisdom by Susan Tate

Expressing gratitude ignites the light within us and is a sure path
  to joy.
—Charlotte Kasl

 

Adopting a conscious attitude of gratitude can bring increased joy into our lives. Remember, what we focus on expands! Oft-quoted Meister Eckhart, the medieval Christian mystic, said, “If the only prayer you say in your life is ‘thank you,’ that would suffice.”

Gratitude for what we have makes us appreciate everything even more. If you awaken in the morning and give thanks for the sky, the birds, the air, the wind, the rain, your heart beating, your ability to breathe, the people in your life—the list is endless—you can’t help but to step into a more joyous day.

My former husband told me more than once, “It’s hard to stay sad when you’re in gratitude.” He was right. I’ve tried switching my thoughts to gratitude when sadness gets overwhelming and it works for me. It doesn’t eliminate the sadness or its cause, but I’ve learned that if I take time to observe and feel the sadness, I can then move away from the painful thoughts through that doorway of gratitude. The more things we are thankful for, the more things to be thankful for will show up in our lives.

Taking time to craft a hand-written letter of gratitude to someone for their kindness is an act that makes at least two people feel great. Please don’t wait for Thanksgiving to consider writing a gratitude letter to a family member, co-worker, or friend. E-mail works too, but there’s something special about receiving a hand-written letter, especially if it was penned with gratitude.

You may want to consider keeping a gratitude journal by your bed. Making a gratitude list at bedtime can help to create a peace-filled sleep, as well as become a wonderful addition to your spiritual practice. Or, you may just choose to close your eyes and rather than count sheep, count all of the things that happened that day that created gratitude.

Several years ago, my friend Roberta gave me a small circle of ten beautiful beads. Each night, I gently touch each bead and say “thank you” for a specific person or event that day. Her simple gift has provided a great way for me to magnify gratitude and it invariably sends me into a peaceful sleep.

The Rev. Dr. Michael Beckwith, founder of the Agape International Spiritual Center in California, shared a powerful statement about gratitude during his 2007 guest appearance on Oprah. He was discussing the Law of Attraction as he said; “Nothing new can come into your life until you are grateful for what you already have.” You may want to read that sentence again.

Celebrating and magnifying gratitude is a wonderful practice that brightens the light of wellness wisdom that resides within each of us. With gratitude as your guide, I invite you to laugh, love, play, and pray your way into the continued nourishment of your mind, body, and spirit. Honor your wellness wisdom within.

. . .  I am grateful for you.

Ways to Magnify Gratitude

  1. Start the day by giving thanks. As you open your eyes, you might say, “Thank you God! I get another day!”
  1. Don’t complain. The universe typically provides us with more of what we speak or think about each day. So the more you complain, the more you’ll find reasons to complain! The more gratitude you acknowledge, more things to be grateful for will appear in your life.
  1. Consider keeping a gratitude journal. Having a gratitude journal by your bed and writing just a few things in it each night can be a beautiful closure to the day.
  1. If journaling isn’t your thing, call to mind ten things you are grateful for before drifting off to sleep.
  1. Write and send thank you notes, not just for something given to you recently but to acknowledge appreciation for something someone did for you in the past.
  1. Don’t wait for Thanksgiving or a special holiday to express gratitude, love, or appreciation to those you love. Call someone now. You’ll make at least two people feel better.
  1. Consider gratitude as a way of being. The suggestions above offer things to do that are supportive in developing the practice of gratitude. The next step is to know you can go even deeper and allow yourself to be the place where gratitude flourishes.

Excerpt from Wellness Wisdom: 31 Ways to Nourish Your Mind, Body, & Spirit by Susan Tate.

Wellness Wisdom by Susan TateBuy Into the Mouths of Babes on Amazon