Are you really good at worrying? Do you believe that it makes you a better person (partner, mother, father, daughter, son, friend) if you worry about someone? Do you think your level of worry has a direct correlation to keeping a loved one safe? Do you think having a high level of worry proves your love for someone? If so, here’s a new view to consider: worrying does not protect your loved ones and it takes a lot of energy away from your daily activities. Might there be a better use for your time and energy?
Gay Hendricks suggests in his book, The Big Leap, that worrying is an addiction. Now that thought grabbed my attention! (So did the rest of his book.) The kicker is, we sometimes hit the jackpot (and feel rewarded) when something we worry about actually comes true. In Hendricks’ words, “If you worry long enough about the stock market crashing, you’ll eventually hit the jackpot, because from time to time it’s always going to crash.”
Worrying just isn’t worth the energy drain, is it? The next time you feel worried, try replacing that thought with a prayer or a trusting image and see if it makes you feel less angst. For some, this might take a while to reprogram a very old pattern of thinking. But you will discover the reframing is worth the effort.
I once heard that worrying over the things we can’t control is a waste of time because we can’t control them. Worrying over the things we can control is a waste of time because we can control them. So, why worry?
It has been said the worrying is like praying for something you don’t want. What do you value more, peace of mind or worrying?
Seven Steps to Support You in Reframing Worrying
- Write down the name of someone or a situation you are worried about right now.
- How does it make you physically feel when you think about that person or situation?
- Write down what you can do, if anything, to control the situation.
- Write down what you can’t control.
- How would you feel if you gave up worrying?
- Do you want to keep on worrying or mindfully choose other things to think about or do?
- Create a prayer or affirming statement that supports you in switching your thinking away from worrying mode. (Check out the Affirmations at the end of my Wellness Wisdom book for ideas. And you may want to check out Nick Ortner’s book, The Tapping Solution to see how this technique supports the reframing of your subconscious. ) Say a prayer or state your affirmation each time worry enters your thoughts. Envision your loved ones surrounded by safety and light.
Adapted from Chapter 17 “Reframe Worrying” from Wellness Wisdom: 31 Ways to Nourish Your Mind, Body, & Spirit by Susan Tate.
©2014 Susan Tate